Sometimes, living abroad away from family, friends, and all that is familiar can be a little bit lonely. This short piece was something I wrote one lonely night while sipping iced Jasmine tea at McDonald’s. The accompanying photos were taken by myself and my friend using my Nokia Lumia during the past few months.
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At the core of us all, there is an existential loneliness that grips us when we least expect it.
Suddenly, we become hyper aware of how alone we are in this world. Families, friends, lovers – none are able to reach that place inside that separate us from them.
The walls are unscalable and there are no doors. We, at the deepest part of ourselves, are alone, as it was meant to be.
Sometimes, this solitude brings us joy. These are the times when we are most at ease, free to be whoever we want to be.
Other times, this solitude is painful. Not the crippling kind of pain, but a perpetual dull ache that makes a mockery of our every attempt to find happiness.
Everyday, we learn to come to terms with our loneliness. We drown ourselves with work or other worthy pursuits.
We turn to hedonism for a temporary escape. We throw ourselves into the idea of love as the cure.
Yet at the end of the day, when all has been said and done, and we lie in bed shrouded in darkness, loneliness is what embraces us.
It cradles us to sleep whispering, “I am here. Always and forever.”
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You might have noticed that I have a fascination for bare trees. My friend said it was depressing, because these usually symbolize death and desolation. I do not see it that way, though. The way I see it, it’s a happy thought when stripped to your very essence, your vulnerabilities exposed for the world to see, one finds beauty. These trees are metaphors of ourselves stripped of all our pretensions. Often, we are scared of our nakedness because we fear rejection and criticism. Yet, we, in all our naked beauty, are beautiful. Just like these bare trees.
Apologies for the somber mood of this post. Hopefully, more positive thoughts are to come. :)
